Ask Poland
by ninjagiraffes234
Summary: As the title says, Ask Poland! Submit your questions in a review and Poland'll totally answer it    Rate M for possible questions people could ask. I'll give each segment about a week until I update  in order to answer as many questions as possible
1. Chapter 1

**So, I've seen this done before, and felt like doing it myself XD**

**Ask Poland! Ask Poland a question and he'll totally answer it!**

**Po: Yeah, like you can totes ask me anything!**

**Anything?**

**Po: Yeah, didn't I like just say anything?**

**Hohoho~**

**Po: Like, What's that laugh for…?**

**Send your questions in a review!**

**Po: Like, do it now!**


	2. Chapter 2

**It's totally been a week you guys. (lol not really) but I'm posting this anyway. Yeah, I know it's really short, but I've only received 2 questions so far. So… yeah… Send in your questions!**

Hello you guys! The questions are already coming in!

Po: Like, I totally want to answer them right now.

Alright, first question:

_Hey Poland how are you? this is Scotland anyway what I wanted to ask you is who is the best lover you have ever had?_

Po: Like, Hey! I'm totally fine! And for your question… O/O

Poland, why're you blushing so much?

Po: /

Poland?

Po: *mumbles* I guess the answer to that it like, totally Liet…

_**Somewhere in Lithuania.**_

Liet: *sneezes*

_**Back here in Polska**_

Well anyway, moving right along.

Po: Yeah, like, I totally want to answer another.

_POLAND wats your favorite animal?_ asks dashing tomas28.

Po: Pffff. I thought that was obvious! It's totally ponies.

Well, I could've answered that…

Po: Especially _pink_ ponies! That would be amazing! I like, actually do have a pink pony! Her name is totally Princess.

How did you manage to get a pink pony?

Po: I, like, bought a white one and dyed her!

Can you do that for me too? Only purple?

Po: Like, sure!


	3. Chapter 3

**Alright! I **_**did**_** tell you guys that this'll be updated every week right? Well, that schedule might get skrewed up here and there due to things that I have to be doing in the real world (stupid real world…) Plus, I might update more frequently then every week (Like, maybe twice a week?)**

**Oh, and check out my poll you guys! I really want to know your opinions!**

**And I didn't specify earlier, but everytime there's a line that doesn't have a name in front of it, that's me speaking. Just letting you know.**

Hey! Next question! This one comes from PrincessAyla1994. "_I can ask questions yes? Okay, so first have you ever tried corsetting to go with your outfits. And are you and Lithuania totally super boyfriends or something? And can i have a hug? ~~Aylalalalas :3"_

Po: Oooo! A princess! You like, have the same as my pony! And no, I like, don't use those corset things. I'm, like totally skinny enough~ And me and Liet are like, totally super boyfriends forever~ And you can totally have a hug! *hugs*

_**Somewhere In Lithuania**_

Liet: *sneezes* Wow, I must be coming down with a cold or something…

_**Back here in Polska**_

So, the next question is "_Has France ever stalked you?"_

Po: Like, why would he do that?

I don't know…

Po: Well not that I can remember… Wait, like yes he has!

Wait, he actually has stalked you?

Po: Like, yeah! It was totally freaky. I woke up one morning and was all like '_Wow, I'm like still totally tired'_ so I like went to the window to wake me up since the sunlight always wakes me up, and when I pulled my curtains back, France was totally there pressing his face against it. I like totally screamed and called Liet over, but by the time he got to my house, France was like gone!

Freaky…

Po: Yeah…

?: _Oh honhonhonhonhon~_

Po: Like, what was that?

I don't know…

Po: …

Well anyway, the next question comes from England!

Po: Like, totally read it to me!

"_Poland,___

_WHAT IS WITH ALL YOU COUNTRIES? Doing this whole question and answer, write letters to, and all that rubbish?___

_I see NO point."_

Po: Like, because it's totally fun! You should like totes try it!

Haha, yeah. Try it Iggy!

?: _Oh honhonhonhonhon~_

Po: Like, where is that laughing coming from? It's totally freaking me out!

I don't know. Let me check. *rummages around*

Po: Have you like, found anything yet?

All I have to do is check the closet. *Opens to a big thud*

Po: Like, what was that?

France: Oh honhonhon…

Po: Like, what are you doing here?

France: Why not? I don't know why you guyz don't like me…

Well, you were just hiding in my closet.

France: And?

Well…

Po: Like, get out! *throws book*

France: C'mon! Poland, you wound me! Let me stay, _pleaze_? I waz kicked out of my houze. I just need a place to stay for a few hours!

Po: Fine *grumbles*

France: Merci, mon ami! Merci!

*phone rings*

Po: Like, who could that be? *answers* Hello?

England: Why're you letting that frog stay with you?

Po: Like, how'd you know about that?

England: It's called black magic! I was keeping track of that git to make sure he didn't find a place to stay!

Harsh…

Po: Well, like, if you don't want him here, then like come get him yourself. *hangs up*

France: Thank you, mon ami! I really appreciate it! *hugs*

Po: Like, it's no problem. As long as you know, you don't like totally rape us or anything.

Well, anyway, keep sending me your questions!


	4. Chapter 4

**Lol, so it looks like we'll be having some frequent writers XD**

**Oh, and I forgot to mention this as well, but this Q&A session thing is very similar to the Christmas bloodbath. Like, it's kinda like a show that Poland's putting on or something, that's why some nations call in lol. Just clearing that up~**

**Oh, and I'm going to try to put different languages in italics. Just so you can establish the differences.**

_D*mn... You ruined my plans! Now I'll retreive the frog, and throw him in a lake!___

_By the way, I DID try it. It's still going. Hello? Iggy's Joining too?___

_AND DON'T CALL ME IGGY!___

_*Drags France out door* This is the last time you try and rape MY man, Frog._

So it looks like Iggy retrieved France while we were gone.

Po: Like, I didn't want him here anyway. He is like so totally annoying.

But you said…

Po: And I like so totally left a few letters on Iggy's Q&A session~ *Phone rings* Like hello?

England: Stop calling me Iggy! *hangs up*

Po: Like, sorry~ Oh, and by saying "My Man", like, who're you referring to? I totally want to know~

Well, moving right along. This one's from America.

_Poland,___

_Yo! America here! Iggy's just on that time of the month. I would know, lol! *totally dating him* So, dude! Liet's been looking pretty bummed lately. Wassup? Y'know?___

_America the Hero_

England has a period? O.o

Po: Like, apparently. And why's my Liet bummed? I'll totally have to ask him! *dials number*

Liet: Hello?

Po: LIET! WHY'RE YOU SAD?

Liet: Whoa! Who said that I was sad?

Po: Like, America totally sent me a letter saying that you were like, bummed and stuff! Like, what's the matter?

Liet: I-it's nothing!

Po: Nothing! It's totally something!

Liet: It's just the normal stuff… Russia's being creepy and Latvia won't keep his mouth shut and Estonia is not helping really… It's just got me a little on edge, alright?

Po: Like, is that it?

Liet: Yeah.

Po: I like, totally don't trust Russia! Come over to my house this instant!

Liet: But-

Po: Like, now!

Liet: Fine… I'll be there shortly… *hangs up*

Po: There! Now Liet won't be sad anymore 'cause he'll totally be with me!

Haha, well, while we wait for him, we can answer another question.

*Phone rings*

Po: Hello?

Russia: _Privet_, little Poland~ I've called in to ask why you are taking my precious little _Litva_ away from me?

Po: 'Cause like you're totally freaking him out!

Russia: _Net_, not freaking out. I'm merely teasing him and his brothers, _da_?

Po: Liet is totally staying here! *hangs up*

Russia freaks me out…

Po: I'm totally not afraid of him!

*knocks on door*

*opens* Hello? Oh, hey, Lithuania! Why're you shaking?

Liet: I just made a mad dash from Russia's house to here… He chased me and now I really just want to hide…

Po: Liet! *hugs* Like, come sit down!

Liet: Gladly…

Hello Lithuania.

Liet: Hello…

Po: Alright let's, like hurry up and put this up! I want more questions!


	5. Chapter 5

**Yeah you guys. I'm not dead (this comment is for those of you who read this story and my other stories). If you've noticed, I haven't updated in a long time. I've just been having major writer's block…**

**Btw, these reviews are keeping this story moving, so if you want this to keep going, I'm going to need more reviews guys! (Seriously. There's no story if there aren't reviews.)**

**Oh, and you guys should totally vote in my poll. Like right now. I'm super interesting in what you guys think~ But keep in mind that the question is what is your favorite pairing name, not what is your favorite pairing… There's a difference lol.**

_Poland, yo!___

_Naw, he doesn't have a period, he just totesly PMS-es. France was all groping me and sh*t, so that's probably why. Iggy's adorable when he's p*ssed, isn't 'e? Lol, dude'd kill me for saying that. Whatevs. So, dude, wassup? Hungary's looking for you an' Lithuania, had her camera and a creepy smile...___

_America the Epic_

Po: Yeah, that like totally sounds like Hungary…

Liet: Why's she looking for us I wonder?

No reason… *giggles*

Po: Well anyways. I like totally agree with America by saying that Iggy is cute. I mean, he can like totally be an ass sometimes, but other than that, he's totally cute. Not as cute as me though. I'm totally the cutest.

*phone rings*

Po: Like, hello?

Iggy: Don't call me an ass you wankah! And haven't I already said to stop calling me Iggy?

Po: Like. Calm down. I was totally joking.

Iggy: Pfff. Fine. I have to go deal with France anyway…

*hangs up*

Oh hey, we just got England's letter:

_Eh? AMERICA! YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO TELL THEM ABOUT MY MAN-PERIOD!___

_*__Eye twitch__*___

_.___

_Anyone see__France__? He escaped from the lake! DX I have to throw him off a__  
><em>_cliff now!_

Po:…

Liet:…

…

Liet: So he really does have a man-period?

I guess so…

Po: Like, don't forget that France escaped! We totally need to be on our guard now.

I agree.

*knocks on door*

Liet: I wonder who that is.

Po: Like, don't open it! It's probably France!

I'll get it.

*opens*

Hungary: Hey!

Po: Like, hey Hungary~ We totally thought that France was at the door.

Hungary: Don't worry. I won't be long. *walks over*

Liet: What's going on?

Po: Like calm down Liet.

Liet: But that look in her eyes… *shudders*

Hungary: Now just pose for a second… *positions Poland and Lithuania in suggestive positions and snaps photos*

Liet: W-what… Just happened…

Po: Like, she totally never changes.

Hungary: Alright then! Bye now! *leaves*

*nosebleeds*

Po: Well anyway. Send us you're questions!


	6. Chapter 6

**Lol, by story, I meant this story guys. (I see some of you were kinda confused by my statement) The bold print is my authors note guys.**

…**.**

_...PFFT. Dude... He really does PMS? I been f*cking him this long and I__  
><em>_didn't know that? Duuude... Just found one of Hungary's cameras in my room,__  
><em>_whaddaya think I should do with it? Watch it? XD Of course, it has me, so it's__  
><em>_obviously hot... Iggy's a screamer, lol, there's a story for you! XDDD___

_America the Smexy_

Po: I totally wonder what's on that camera.

Liet: I don't think I want to know…

I didn't want to know that he was a screamer… Oh hey, we got England's letter here too.

_...America, that letter was so gramatically incorrect... I don't have enough__  
><em>_time to correct it, seeing as how I have to keep up with my own letter...um,__  
><em>_story?___

_Ahem, anyways...___

_I found him now, no worries. I locked him in Russia's basement. (Oh, and I__  
><em>_told Russia France drank on his vodka.)___

_Ah,__sweet revenge__.___

_Stop calling me cute!_

Po: So, we like don't need to worry about France now.

Liet: Thank god…

Now I kinda feel sorry for France… Who knows what Russia's going to do with him…

Po: We should, like totally take a vote.

Liet: Vote about what?

Po: Like, about what Russia's going to do with France.

That actually sounds like a good idea…

Liet: Sounds kinda weird…

I'll go make it right now…

…

**I totally am going to make that poll you guys. Check my profile later to vote in it. It would be awesome if you voted in it. And sorry for this being super short.**


End file.
